You Are Middle-Aged


If you are losing touch with new technology, are growing increasingly hairy — in all the wrong places — and increasingly detest noisy environments, then you are middle-aged. Significantly, many now characterize the middle-aged years as 44-60. And, of course, if you continually misplace your glasses or feed the neighborhood birds more frequently, though you are still younger than 44 years, then you may just be acting middle-aged. Read on for some more telltale signs of your imminent demise.

From the Washington Post:

How do you know you’re middle-aged? How about when you wear clothes and shoes based on comfort rather than style, or grow hair in all the wrong places: nose, ears, eyebrows? Those are just two of the signs mentioned in a recent British survey about when middle age begins and how to identify it.

The 2,000 people surveyed by Benenden, a health-care and insurance firm, also made clear that middle age was no longer something for 30- or 40-year-olds to worry about. The life change, they said, began at 53. In fact, nearly half of the older-than-50s who were surveyed said they personally had not experienced “middle age” yet.

“A variety of factors — including more active lifestyles and healthier living — mean that people find their attitudes towards getting older are changing. Over half of the people surveyed didn’t feel that there even was such a thing as ‘middle age’ anymore,” Paul Keenan, head of communications at Benenden Health, said in a statement when the survey was released in August.

“Being ‘old’ appears to be a state of mind rather than being a specific age,” he added. “People no longer see ‘middle age’ as a numerical milestone and don’t tend to think of themselves as ‘old’ as they hit their fifties and beyond. I’m 54 myself, with the mind-set of a thirty-something — perhaps sometimes even that of a teenager!”

So beyond comfort shoes and ear hair, what are some signs that you’re no longer young? Here’s the full list offered up by respondents to the survey. Some are particularly British (e.g., joining the National Trust, taking a flask of tea on a day out). But you’ll get the point.

Losing touch with everyday technology such as tablets and TVs

Finding you have no idea what “young people” are talking about

Feeling stiff

Needing an afternoon nap

Groaning when you bend down

Not remembering the name of any modern bands

Talking a lot about your joints/ailments

Hating noisy pubs

Getting more hairy — ears, eyebrows, nose, face, etc.

Thinking policemen/teachers/doctors look really young

Preferring a night in with a board game than a night on the town

You don’t know any songs in the top 10

Choosing clothes and shoes for comfort rather than style

Taking a flask of tea on a day out

Obsessive gardening or bird feeding

Thinking there is nothing wrong with wearing an anorak

Forgetting people’s names

Booking a cruise

Misplacing your glasses, bag, car keys, etc.

Complaining about the rubbish on television these days

Gasping for a cup of tea

Getting bed socks for Christmas and being very grateful

Taking a keen interest in “The Antiques Road Show”

When you start complaining about more things

Listening to the Archers

You move from Radio 1 to Radio 2

Joining the National Trust

Being told off for politically incorrect opinions

Flogging the family car for something sportier

When you can’t lose six pounds in two days anymore

You get shocked by how racy music videos are

Taking a keen interest in the garden

Buying travel sweets for the car

Considering going on a “no children” cruise for a holiday

When you know your alcohol limit

Obsessively recycling/ knowing the collection dates

Always carrying a handy pack of tissues

Falling asleep after one glass of wine

Spending more money on face creams/anti-aging products

Preferring a Sunday walk to a lie-in

By comparison to those who participated in the British survey, Americans have a different take on when middle age begins, at least according to a paper published in 2011 by researchers at Florida State University. That study, which used nationally representative data collected in 1995-1996 and 2004-2006, showed that the perceived beginning of middle age varied, not surprisingly, depending on the age group that was providing the estimate. Overall, the researchers said, most people think of middle age as beginning at 44 and ending at 60.

Read the entire article here.

Image courtesy of Google Search.